Wednesday, July 6, 2011

The Courts Decision

I was going to write a big long post on the whole day of court but decided that ignorant woman has wasted enough of my time in the past year and a half, so I will give the basics.

The day before court we had to meet with her lawyer for Jake to sign the Joint Management Trial Report. I think her lawyer was getting pissed I was there and making sure Jake wasn't getting suckered into anything. Like the fact that her lawyer left off ALL of our evidence exhibits. So if we hadn't noticed we couldn't have used them. We objected to her grandfather and mother testifying for her as it was bias and Jake wasn't allowed family to testify for him or give written declarations for the first trial they had because of bias. Also we objected to her "fiance". They met in February, broke up after two weeks and got back together in April/May and are now engaged. What a shit show that woman is.


Her lawyer got inches from my face out of nowhere and told me that what I was doing was immoral. For ripping the boys from their mother and creating conflict between parents who already don't get along. He said that I was just trying to go to court so I could play mommy. Adrenaline kicked in so I don't remember what I said, something along the lines of her not even being a mother because a mother wouldn't neglect her children. He tried to pull some line that she wasn't neglecting them and that our evidence was garbage. I asked how your kids wearing too small of clothes and bleeding diaper rashes isn't neglect. He was so pissed off he was breaking a sweat and his upper lip was twitching. He started ranting that I thought neglect was about too small of clothes and that's why we were going to court. I said that is part of it, along with bleeding diaper rashes, lack of medical care etc. 


I could see he has a real bad temper like she does. I believe he was testing me. He wanted to put me under pressure to see if he could intimidate me. He wanted to know how I would be on the stand, under oath the next day. To see if he could push me around and how I'd react to his comments.


We went to court. They dismissed our medical records because it was "hearsay" because we didn't subpoena the doctor. We did subpoena Nathan's counselor he sees and even then they wouldn't let her testify what Nathan had told her and why she called CPS because that is "hearsay". She's what they call and "expert witness" and they can be very important to a trial and yet it was pointless to have her. Her lawyer is the shadiest mofo ever.


Partway through Jake's testimony her lawyer spun around, gave me the death glare and asked the judge why we were sitting in the room. She told him she had asked if he objected to witnesses and he hadn't responded so she let us stay in there. He objected right then so we were asked to sit in the hallway until called to testify. Jake's mom and aunt stayed in to watch as they weren't witnesses.


I guess from all I heard is that her family lied their asses off for her. They in a way sunk her talking about her yelling at the kids and that she was going out partying every night at one point, BUT she had changed her ways. (HAHAHAHA).

I guess when she got on the stand she would be asked a question and ramble on and on and bounce around subjects. I bet her lawyer wanted to tell her to shut the hell up but since Jake was cross examining her he couldn't say a damn word except to object to a question he may ask. She screwed herself by not just answering the question. The judge had to remind her that hearsay was not allowed and reminded her numerous times to ANSWER THE QUESTION because she was trying to avoid it with all the rambling. She also would get really angry with Jake asking questions.

Thankfully since we were kicked out I got to ask her ex best friend who was testifying for us what she had. From everything she knew I was able to create questions for Jake to ask her so that the evidence could be brought to light. She had SO MUCH incriminating evidence. Stuff she had seen her do like leave the kids in the tub for four hours because she was consumed with talking online. That she would feed Nathan a lunch of a pop tart, candy bar and mountain dew. That she would meet guys from online at a park to have sex with them and take the kids along. WHO FREAKING DOES THAT?! Her testimony was our life line. She knew so much that we didn't even know she knew! And since she had seen it first hand from the boys' mother nothing was hearsay from her.

I testified and was completely calm. I spoke clearly. Her lawyer was trying to use the fact that all our court paperwork was filled out in my handwriting was Jake not caring about his kids and that I was the one doing everything and wanted the kids. He didn't get far on that as I got him shot down pretty quickly and he wouldn't let me elaborate. The guy is a moron.

In the end we got 50/50. The judge said that she had major concerns with her parenting and had a list. The list was: 

-Diaper Rashes
-Foul Language
-Yells at children
-Drinking & Partying
-Anger at Jake
-Nathan in Diapers until almost 7 years old
-Nathan sleeping on the couch
-Cookies for breakfast
-Nathan walking to school (Jake had a huge issue with this but CPS said it was parental discretion. Apparently the judge was very concerned with this, especially with the area that they live in)
-Too much smoking around kids
-Her being out of control
-Nathan not having his reading logs completed and not sending them to us to mark our reading time with him down.
-Nathan's tardiness to school while with her.

HUGE list they had against her and two very minor things against Jake. Like that he took them to the doctor too often without her knowing. Funny thing is she knew because we told her that the kids needed to go and she always refused. Then we had to take him 4 or 5 times for his bleeding diaper rashes. Jake even told her once that we had went and we were documenting them and that they needed to stop.

In the end the judge told us that if any of the things on the list continue or stop and then start later that he can request for a modification and she will give him full custody. Hallelujah. She is going to start slacking off and in the end we WILL get them. All her rambling brought up most of those issues and the judge could see her anger and out of control attitude from her testifying.

We now get so much more time with them, it is going to be wonderful! More consistent potty training for Ethan, hopefully the less stress will help Nathan stop the bed wetting and more family guidelines and less time with her will help their attitudes. They are such AMAZING and well behaved boys but that first day back from them its a battle of wills because there is no discipline at her house so they think they can do whatever they want at our house so we have to reign them in.

I can't wait to get the boys full time and give them a normal life. Get them out of the household where they live with her, her older brother, her uncle and her parents. That's not a normal household for a kid to grow up in. As soon as she starts getting bored she will slack off, or when she starts planning her "wedding" she will be too consumed and forget about their care. Best believe we will be documenting everything and have a camera with us at ALL times.

She started sinking her own boat and in a matter of time she's going to be sunk and without a life raft.

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