Thursday, March 31, 2011

Huggies!

Does anyone buy and/or use Huggies? Do you notice these stickers on their products?


If you do not use the code please feel free to email them to me. I haven't gotten to explore their entire website to see what exactly they can be redeemed for but anything saving us money on diapers for 2 kids would be greatly appreciated. Hopefully after April our stubborn Ethan will start potty training and it'll only be Huggies for one baby.

Even if you yourself do not use them, do me a favor and let others know about my blog or this post. Please and thanks! :)

Oh my goodness, 10 days!

I cannot believe we are down to 10 days already. It's so mind blowing. We've been so busy I haven't even had time to dwell on how quickly it has arrived.

I got my Kitchen Aid finally. The family member I got it from registered it in October of 1981. I was like oh my goodness! Jake laughed when he realized it was a year older than him. However I made vanilla cupcakes which smell heavenly with pink butter cream frosting and then we made a double batch of Oatmeal Scotchies. The house smells gooood.

Tomorrow our evidence is due to her lawyer. He sent us a 46 page packet to be filled out...here is what it looks like now!

Pretty sure that is a ream of paper. He has 3 weeks to prepare her defense. As far as we know they have nothing on us. Very minor things as the boys are always first and we always try to be the bigger man and do right by everyone. I hope he takes his sweet old time going through everything and charges her up the wazoo! For all the time it has taken me over the past year to document each day, to photograph everything, to collect all our other evidence and hours and hours and hours and HOURS of freaking research, plus the money we've spent for all of this; I hope her grandpa's money ship is sunk. 

I was never one for praying, I guess I never really had anything to pray about. The past couple weeks I've really been trying to. I see little results everyday. I will continue to pray everyday until the trial. Prayers form anyone else are so very welcome! These boys deserve to be with us. I try not to think about what will happen to us if we don't get them, I refuse. All I think about is how hard I'm going to cry when we do get them and how much better all of our lives will be.

Then when that is over it'll be the 5 of us. It'll be so hectic crazy and I will love every minute of it. I can't wait to be able to get them all ready and take a walk to the park, to start playing tennis again, all the trips to the YMCA for swimming and activities. All the crafts, baking and photography I can muster.

I'm trying to be really focused and determined that once he is here I'm going to do as much walking and swimming as I can, along with tennis once it gets nice. With 4 boys to keep track of I have to be in better shape than I was when I got pregnant. (Which was no shape at all). I of course have to wait and see how Emery adjusts and how I adjust to mommy hood once he's here before I can start making plans. Fingers crossed and lots of prayers for a wonderful April!

Monday, March 28, 2011

38W1D OB Appt

Emery's heart rate was 136 today, the week before it was 142. I'm so busy I forget to update about the appts since they happen weekly. Bev said it was lower because he's sleeping.

He's still head down but he hasn't dropped yet I guess. Funny because with all the pressure and stabbing pains I was sure he had. Guess when he actually does I won't be mobile at all because I can barely get in and out of bed or off the couch now.

She checked me and I'm still at a 1. It hurt so badly to be checked that I decided it's not happening again. I wasn't wanting to be checked every week anyway but now I'm just gonna wait till the real thing starts.

I'm soooo tired today. I even took a nap and fell out pretty quickly when usually I lay there for an hour until it overcomes me. I think I'm getting low on iron. I was feeling so good that I wasn't taking it consistently. It's hard to take at an opposite time of my prenatal when they both make me sick and have to be taken with food. But I'm so exhausted now that I took 2 because we're going to be wayyy too busy this week for me to be overly exhausted which leads to emotional.

I'm still predicting he'll be on time or late and Jake is still thinking he'll come early. I've had quite a few Braxton Hicks the past couple days so I'm sure I still have at least a week. We shall see.

I'm just glad he's healthy and doing well in there.

Sunday, March 27, 2011

Preparing for Emery

Most moms start getting REALLY anxious for the baby to come the last couple weeks. They're anticipating every contraction wondering when the moment is coming.

As of today I'm 38 weeks. I have two weeks left. I'm not anxious at all. I can't be when I'm so worried about the boys.

I had to drag myself from mounds of paperwork and evidence to go start the three loads of baby clothes, to organize the diapers from the baby shower, to wash his sheets, to rearrange his room as needed. I'm so mentally exhausted from this that I can't even think of when he'll show up.

This is either saving me from the insanity of waiting or it's just not good.

Either way I have no doubt this will not affect me as a mother when he gets here. I will have three little boys to take care of. Emery will be the easy part. He will never go without, ever. He'll be a little more predictable than our 3 year old who wants to party in the middle of the night.

The last two nights Ethan was up 3 times in the middle of the night. We woke up Saturday morning to find 3 muffins on the table, a jar of peanut butter, 2 jelly's, a bag of bread and three spoons. This morning we found apple sauce and my Chai Tea mix he had poured into a bowl (curious the face he made when he tried to eat this with a spoon and got SPICE). I always hear when he gets up. I'm so in-tune that I can hear toys being played with or the door closing. I think he had gotten into all of this the first time and I got up when I heard the door close.

Nathan said he does this every night at his moms. He is up at all hours of the night (because she lets him take naps at 6pm and later so his body thinks night time is his day time) and he is left unattended. He said no one gets up. One night he had dragged a chair from their dining room down the hall to his room and climbed up to some shelf in his closet to get the playdoh his mom had hid and stayed up all night playing with it. I WANT TO SCREAM! What food is he eating at her house in the middle of the night, what things is he getting into at night, how long until he gets severely hurt or burns down the house?!

Today we got a latch for the fridge. We cannot screw in safety devices to the cupboards so we're setting up a gate in the hallway or right at the kitchen so he cannot get in, and if he does he'll be so loud in the process that I'll be on him like white on rice.

Ignorance is bliss...except when it involves your children. I laid there awake for hours after the 2 and 3 times I put him back to bed wondering when he was getting up next. How are Jake and I supposed to sleep when they're not here knowing that NO ONE does that at his other home and he could be getting into God knows what.

I wish CPS would buck up and ask the right questions. They either look too hard or they don't look hard enough. I have so much evidence it's coming out our ears and yet they play God, they decide what THEY think is immediate danger to a child. Is unsupervised anything not immediate danger?! They had to investigate once when both kids were left home alone for her to go party and yet they won't take other calls seriously.

I'm praying, praying sooo hard that the courts see this and realize how much she is damaging her kids and not giving one shit about it. Kids deserve so much more, but to her its not what her kids need. It is what she needs. New clothes, her hair done, buying a car, boozing it up 5 nights a week and yet our 3 year old is wearing 6-12 month socks that have holes and are threadbare. Apparently she missed the memo where being a parent is supposed to turn you from selfish to selfless. Makes me sick.

Friday, March 25, 2011

Testing results, or lack of.

The doctor feels as if he meets the criteria but since he isn't 2 years behind in development they are very cautious to prescribe anything. WHO WAITS THAT LONG FOR THEIR CHILD TO FALL BEHIND?!  We appreciate that the doctor is cautious as many doctors just diagnose and cover up a problem that may not even be there. The way he put it was "taking Tylenol to mask a fever, when we don't know what caused the fever." We agreed that we do not want him medicated unless it is very necessary. We were referred to 3 psychologists who are going to do further testing to see if it is just a certain subject he has problems with, if it is something deeper such as stress from an unstable home at his moms or something else. We also will let his regular psychologist know so that she can start looking for different things. So we'll be making appointments to have it looked into it. 

Also we will be able to discuss our options as to which will be the best match for him depending on the outcome. I know that a lot of kids with ADHD if its not a severe case only use medication on school days, not weekends or summer breaks. He doesn't act out aggressively or anything, its merely he is unable to focus at school, is disruptive at school and even at home needs constant reminders. If it is something he has we are willing to do whatever it takes to work with him on overcoming this challenge and learning to control it so that no medication is necessary. Hopefully if we get custody he won't need it at all since he should have very little stress and a very loving home where they get attention and don't have to act for it, where they have guidelines and proper discipline rather than screaming and yelling like he deals with at her home. 

The doctor was very clear on how important a good nights rest is which I believe to be one of the biggest reasons since he sleeps on a couch and doesn't get good rest. Plus this morning he said he was up at 6am watching TV because his brother woke him up. If he wasn't in a living room with a TV he probably would have went back to sleep.

I hate this waiting game. I just want them with us where they are fed nutritious meals and get the necessary 10-12 hours of sleep and love, affection and the chance to enjoy their childhood. I am so furious that we just have to sit back and watch as she causes more issues in these boys.

Thursday, March 24, 2011

Big day tomorrow.

No baby. Big brudder Nathan is having his ADHD evaluation done.

It's been a long road for us. All of the signs we chalked up the the stress of the situation. We are very good about not saying anything about the court situation or discussing any of it around the kids. They don't need to stress about it and only worry about being a child, however his mother doesn't feel the same and tells him stuff that stresses him out.

We thought the bed wetting may have been from stress from all of that, it's a lot for an 8 year old to handle. I remember when I was 9 or 10 my mom started working a 2nd or 3rd job and apparently it stressed me out so badly that I wet the bed. I felt like I was on the potty and started going. I woke up and felt sooo ashamed. That was the only time it ever happened but it gave me a little insight into his situation. Add to the fact that his mother had him in diapers until he was 7 at her house until the courts got on her about it, she's not a good role model in the anti-lazy department.

However the situation has gotten so much worse. It went from never to every once in awhile, to consistent to constant and last weekend he did it even during nap during the day. Went from just night time to that and day time. We are so stressed trying to help him, to find out the reason why and help but he just looks at us blankly. We've also asked her numerous times to help us on her end but she just dismisses it. She obviously doesn't care that this is not normal and that this can lead to humiliation especially if kids at school start making fun of him. Children can be so cruel. We end up feeling stressed out to completely helpless and back again. With a baby on the way it's going to be hard to be changing a baby, a stubborn almost 3 year old who doesn't want to be potty trained and an 8 year olds constant laundry twice a day.

We ruled out another situation we thought it may have been and the only thing I knew to try after that was ADHD testing. Maybe his mind is SO busy with everything that he sleeps so hard at night or it's going so much at night even that he doesn't know to get up.

They gave us a packet to fill out and it was an eye opener of how much there is to ADHD that we didn't realize and how much of it related to him. He is an amazing little boy and so so smart. It was just little things we started noticing, the constant foot tapping. Telling him to do something and he'd take 5 steps to go do it and get side tracked and we'd have to remind him of what we asked. Picking on his little brother and didn't even phase him when he'd be told time and time again to quit picking on his brother that it was upsetting him. We thought maybe its because at his moms all he does is watch TV and play video games and when he's done with that picking on Ethan is good entertainment, plus she encourages that by picking on him too and thinking its so cute even though Ethan gets so upset! However at our house we do stuff every time we have them. We have games, they have so many toys it can barely be contained, we go do activities every weekend and he still is just a busy bee and gets bored.

His teacher told us that she was so happy we had brought in the packet as she really feels "he's an ADHD kiddo". I guess his mom has ADD so it makes sense that he would have it. She said he's gotten really disruptive in class even with reminders. Just today when Jake went to pick up the packet he walked to the class and she asked a question, Nathan answered. She asked another kid a question and Nathan answered and she had to remind him that he had answered and it was another kids turn. It's good that he pays attention in class and will answer, but he doesn't understand boundaries. It happens here as well, we ask Ethan to do something and he runs to go do it or answers for him. It gets frustrating.

So tomorrow we have the evaluation. We don't want to medicate him but if its necessary then we will as its best for him. He deserves to think and focus like other kids his age. His brain needs to do what it needs to and not overwork itself. I also believe that if we get custody he will not have to be medicated. Sometimes ADHD can be linked to a deficiency and can be changed just by a certain diet. Considering that he does not have a consistent sleep schedule at her house, sleeps on a couch and does not eat a good healthy meal except when he is with us it makes sense that he may be lacking something. If he was here and had good consistent sleep every night along with good healthy meals, his vitamins and proper guidelines/discipline he would learn how to work with it.

I really hope that this is where it ends. All we want is for him to be able to think and act like a kid his age, not frantic processing. It's something that definitely has a remedy. If it doesn't end here I have no idea where to go next. Sleep apnea? Diabetes testing? The research is stressful and breaks my heart. Fingers crossed that we get some answers tomorrow!

Wednesday, March 23, 2011

Extreme Makeover: Home Edition

Never fails to make me cry. They "move that bus!" and I'm immediately in tears!

I don't know why I torture myself watching it because I always am stuffy and get a headache from the crying but I can't not change the channel.

It's the one show on TV that isn't garbage. That is about people putting others before themselves and helping people when they need it the most. I can't handle watching all the crap shows on TV like Jersey Shore and whatever other stupid stuff is on. 

People have no idea the real meaning of happiness. I mean I guess to some people getting shitfaced every night and making out with random people at the bar could be their happiness, but I'd rather watch other people be happy. Nothing is more satisfying to Jake and I than watching the boys be happy and have. I don't think I ever grew up because I get more excited than they do about the zoo and aquarium. I love getting excited and showing them new things and teaching them, telling them stories.

I can't even wait till Emery gets here and we get to take him to do all that fun stuff, to see him laugh and smile...it means so much more to give to others in even the simplest way than to live some selfish lifestyle.


Tuesday, March 22, 2011

I am so overwhelmed.

I ended up with this bump on my inner thigh. I used to get them every once in awhile and they'd reallllly hurt for a week and then go away. Well this one didn't, it ended up bigger than a golf ball in diameter and raised probably a half inch off my normal skin. It was so uncomfortable to sit or have clothes touch so finally after 3 or 4 days of suffering I left work early to go to the doctor. He called it Cellulitis, which is close but since I've had them since freshman year of high school or so and after much research I know it as Hidradenitis Suppurativa. He put me back on Amoxicillin and gave me an ointment to rub on it 3 times a day and told me to take lots of baths. I told him I took one or two everyday and he said take 2 or 3 if you can. The heat brings the blood and antibiotics to the area.

A day later it started bleeding. SO GROSS, but such a relief as it relieved a lot of pressure. He said that its because my immune system is basically non existent because I'm pregnant.

These last 2 months have been HELL. Being sick for weeks at a time, now this and after this probably a raging yeast infection because of the 20+ days of antibiotics. Kayla 0 Pregnancy +2 with a pending third.

I never thought I'd say this because I was enjoying my pregnancy but I'm ready to be done! For the simple fact that I want my immune system back.

I can deal with the swollen feet, the sore lip, the getting up to pee every night 3 times a night, waking up coughing my lungs out in the middle of the night because I'm so full of hormones, the heartburn, the knees and elbows to random insides, the feeling that my crotch is going to fall out...most everything but not the sinus shit and definitely not raging sebaceous lumps of skin inside my leg. OVER IT!

I even had to change my lip ring to a horseshoe. Mind you my lips were full to begin with so after they pierced it I never changed the piercing stud because the smaller ones for normal people were too tight. So this one was long which never mattered unless I smiled a certain way and it would stick out a bit. My lips have now swollen so much that all that extra room was no more. My lip ring was being sucked into my lip. So now I have a big hideous horseshoe in there.

So from all this being sick and missing 2 1/2 days because I could not walk, I could not sleep and I definitely couldn't sit, no pressure on my right leg whatsoever. I had to sit on my left leg and lean to keep pressure off my right thigh. Impossible when your back and pelvis already hurts from normal sitting! So I took the time off and today my supervisor called to tell me that my temp assignment that was ending March 30th is now ending this Friday. I started crying and told her that I was really sorry and thank you for the opportunity but everything has gone to hell in pregnant Kayla body. She said she totally understands as it's the last two months and she's been there and is currently pregnant again.

This just makes me feel so guilty because now that is an entire week of no pay that could have went to make sure we were able to comfortably make ends meet while I'm on maternity leave and now I'll probably have to go back to work after a month to help out. 

AND ON TOP OF THAT. We had 5 days to fill out a 46 page packet on what makes Jake the better parent than the boys' mom, what their differences are on a zillion different topics and then we had to provide ALL of our evidence. If it's not done by tomorrow he's filing a motion to comply and we have to pay his attorney fees, when he's not even our freaking attorney. So I spent 30 bucks and 2 hours standing at a copier coping hundreds of photos of the boys' neglect and a hundred of her doing the stuff she does, and now have to fill out 26 pages of info in the packet, all tonight. In 3 hours so I can be up in time for my last 3 days of work. If I don't go I'm going to have an emotional meltdown.

Maybe it's a blessing in disguise and I'll go into labor next week when my mom and sister are here. Direct all thoughts to middle of next week for Emery's grand entrance into the world!

Wednesday, March 9, 2011

Boycotting Fuel?

Really?

I think people are ignorant when they think that's going to make a difference? Fuel costs go up EVERYWHERE because they have no other option, it's the economy and so far no one is fixing that very well. Boycotting, if it really does anything is just cause it to spike higher. People still buy fuel the day before and the day after and every other day. One day isn't going to do anything, maybe a couple weeks and that's just not possible because people have jobs, lives, hobbies, whatever they do that they need to get around to do. More power to you if you can though you're only ONE in a population of 310,958,000.

If you want to boycott something, do it for something that makes sense and will make a difference.

You want a cause to support? 

St Jude's Children's Research Hospital
March of Dimes
American Breast Cancer Foundation

Childhood Leukemia Foundation
National Children's Cancer Society
Children's Cancer Research Institute
Locks of Love
American Foundation for Disabled Children 
American Heart Association
Autism Speaks
American Cancer Society
Operation Smile
Doctors Without Borders
Habitat for Humanity
Teach For America
The Red Cross

and guess what....all of those are non profit. They're not making a profit, they're helping people. The stuff we should all be trying to do, not screwing other countries because we thing boycotting fuel affects them. Guess what...it doesn't. It just effects our economy. 


Tuesday, March 8, 2011

Ready, Set, Go!

Starting at 8am I had really intense cramps when I got to work. Like bad menstrual cramps in the front and back. Wasn't round ligament pain because mine was sharp pains when I had that a couple times.

I wait till 10 and called the doctor and she told me to time any contractions. I never know when I have them unless I happen to touch my belly and feel it hard. So of course the two times I did it was hard for about 2 or 3 minutes but didn't hurt.

The nurse decided to have me come in and get checked just in case because I'm not quite 36 weeks.

I don't have a bladder infection so Bev had me wait for Sara to see what she wanted to do next.

We discussed the feeling and she decided to check me. OMG it hurt. She even commented on how much he was moving, I was like I know, it never stops. If their activity in the womb has anything to say about how they'll be as a kid I'm in for a realllllly active little man. Sports here we come!

So the results? I'm dilated to a 1 and had a tiny bit of blood. This isn't a huge number to me because you can stay at a one for weeks! She checked my measurements and with some other person and they decided I was fine. He said no restrictions, whoever this man was. She told me to rest anyway whenever I can.

He better not come out way early or Jake wins the bet. My family always goes late with babies so I bet that I would too. My sister is a traitor and thinking they messed up my due date so she's siding with Jake.

The doctor said to just watch, so I said 'alright I'll just roll with it." Her and the nurses thought that was the best line. Guess we'll see in a couple weeks how it plays out.

Sunday, March 6, 2011

Volunteer Work.

Last week I was browsing the DSHS website. I was looking on what would be a valid call to CPS since they refused to file a report when Jake had to call. I'm frustrated with the whole system. We don't call just because, we only call when there is something that MUST be documented.

I found a website to volunteer for the WA CASA program. CASA = Court Appointed Special Advocates. Basically they provide about 40 hours of training on subjects regarding children who are abused or neglected. 

Here's a little information I got off of their website.


A Court Appointed Special Advocate (CASA) is a volunteer who is appointed by a judge to advocate for an abused or neglected child in dependency court*.
*Dependency court (sometimes called 'the dependency system' or 'the system'): Dependency court is part of the superior court, and it hears cases about children who have been abused and neglected. In cases where the abuse or neglect is severe enough, the children will be taken out of their parents' homes and placed into foster care.
The CASA volunteer investigates the child's world by talking to the child, as well as to her teachers, parents, relatives, caregivers... anyone who has an impact on the child's life, and then makes recommendations to the court as to what is in the child's best interests. Those recommendations can range from whether the child should return to his parents or stay in foster care, to suggesting counseling services, special education classes, or substance abuse help for the child. The CASA volunteer's only objective is to recommend a course of action that will keep the child safe, and will address the child's unique, unmet needs.
While a child is in foster care, they face a constant rotation of judges, social workers, foster parents, and attorneys, all of whom are often only temporarily involved in the child's life, and for whom that child's case is one out of many. The CASA volunteer, however, commits himself to stay with the case for the duration (very rarely does it happen that the CASA volunteer will change mid-case), and it's a best practice that one CASA volunteer shouldn't take more than three cases at any given time. This means that each child is the CASA volunteer's priority.

Since state law and the federal Child Abuse Prevention and Treatment Act (CAPTA) both require that all abused and neglected children have someone to represent their best interests in court, a CASA volunteer is appointed when available. When a CASA is not available, the court must appoint a paid guardian ad litem or no representation at all.
Last year, CASA volunteers:
  • donated approximately 350,000 hours of service to children
  • averaged 15-20 hours every month to each child they advocated for
  • represented a community value of over $17 million
Despite record numbers of children being served, more than 6,000 children went without a CASA volunteer last year*.
*Due to a lack of program staff to recruit, train, and adequately support enough volunteers, local CASA programs cannot currently serve every child that enters the system.
In 2008, more than 2,400 CASA volunteers advocated for the best interests of 7,355 abused and neglected children in Washington.  

I signed up for it to get further information and see what it would take. I discussed it with Jake and then today I discussed it with my dad when he called. He was really glad that I would do something like that and that it could lead to a career. I've wanted to get into psychology and early child development but I know that I don't and won't have the money to go to a University to do all that. This would be a step in the right direction. I can make a difference in a child's life without paying thousands to have a license. I've thought about it a lot and weighed the pro's and con's.

I wondered how hard it would be emotionally and realized it can't be any worse than watching what our boys go through and they have no one but us fighting for them.
 
So many children go without someone to stand up and speak for them. So many still will but that would be a few less with the ones I could help.

I worry about how much time I'd lose with Emery and if I'd be too busy with him for a case but it's only 15-20hrs a month on average. 

There are so many kids worse off than our boy's. They have Jake and I and our families fighting for them but CPS won't and the courts are too busy to really look into it. I think about all the kids who don't have at least one parent who gives a shit about them and are just bouncing around from home to home or dealing with worse than most.

There's so much more I want to write on this issue but the neighbors kids have been stomping up and down the stairs outside for about 30 minutes and I'm slowly losing my marbles.

I can't get the website to work today but the link is www.washingtonstatecasa.org . I'm sure everyone is busy with their crazy lifestyles, but I'm sure that in your state there are kids who need someone who cares to stand up and speak for them. If you have the time look into in your state and help save a kid.

I'm calling tomorrow to tell them I want to do this and to start the interview and background check.

Antibiotics....finally!

After missing half a day on Wednesday and then all day Thursday I went to the doctor on Friday. I was determined to keep going until they gave me antibiotics because I know its not just viral.

I have a sinus infection and an ear infection.

Pretty sure I told the doctor that I don't get anything viral, it always turns into a sinus infection. I never get just colds, it's always something more.

Just so glad to get antibiotics so that I can get better. It's been almost 6 weeks of being sick and I'm ready to be better. PLUS as of today I have 5 weeks left. I'm doing hypnobirthing which has lots of DEEP relaxation breathing and I can't do that if I can't freaking breathe because I'm so full of snot.

So ready to do this.

We also took Nathan to the doctor and he has bronchitis as well which could have turned into pneumonia. So her lack of care for the boys and neglecting to take them to the doctor for their "little cough and sniffle" is now a major things requiring antibiotics. We won't even go into the fact that pneumonia kills grown adults who can get rest, drink fluids and take their medicine when needed, let alone what it would do to an 8yo who can't do that. At least all of us are now medicated so hopefully it'll be a long time before we're sick again and hopefully after April and the boys will be with us. Fingers crossed!

Friday, March 4, 2011

Pop Quiz!

Let's take a pop quiz!

You have an almost 3 year old. A tall 2 months shy of 3 year old boy. What size socks should this boy be wearing? What size shirt should he be wearing?

I'm sure most of your answers are very close. The person who dressed him today put him in threadbare 6-12 month socks & 12-18 month shirt. Let's just say they failed this test & every other parenting one that they're dealt. I'm SO angry. April is too far away! I'm so angry I cannot sleep. All I think about is documentation, phone calls, court papers etc etc. 
So much for cuddling up with Jake and taking a nap, my brain won't shut off. Guess I'll take a hot bath until my doctors appointment this afternoon. I better get antibiotics!

Thursday, March 3, 2011

34W5D

I got my hair done last night. My friend Whitney came over and touched up my highlights and did a tint around. My hair used to be black. Let's take a look-see.

I believe this was 2006 or 2007. My hair was SO long and gorgeous.


Cue bad break-up: Hair gets chopped off and I start growing out dark.

Go for a drastic a-line which I rocked along with my natural color. Few months before I started beauty school.

Go all over blonde with purple slices in the side. 

Over time I got tired of the super blonde and wanted my hair like.....Jimmy Choo 2010 Campaign.



Kinda got messed up in the insane color correction I had to do. Filling hair, coloring hair, coloring again and again so that my hair wasn't hollow looking because I was SO blonde. Ended up going with...

Mostly dark with some highlights. Took much getting used to.

 Slowly worked my way a little more blonde and this was what I had last March when I was in Vegas. I'm currently working towards this length again...





I am now rocking this until my hair grows out to the length I want.

33W5D
It'll be so much easier to maintain the dark hair with a little one to take care of and I'll be rocking the pony's for awhile. With an a-line and my curly-ish hair it is a MUST to flat iron everyday and I just won't have the time and don't want to feel sloppy everyday.

So there we have it. A tour, more for my sake than anyone's :)


Tuesday, March 1, 2011

Surprise numero dos

I am pregnant!

Psych, we already knew that. I'm sick. Again.

I'm so over this. Took me 3 weeks to get over the shit and just as I'm getting better the boys get something. Of course "mom of the year" doesn't take them to the doctor because it's "just a cough and a sniffle" even though there is a neon snot coming from Ethan's nose, he can't talk suddenly, just whine. He's no longer independent and wanting to do everything himself, only daddy can do it and if Kayla tries to help he yells at me.

Nathan has a cough from hell and his face is flushed 24/7 andddd over the counter medicine hasn't helped for a week.

Add in the fact that Nathan usually eats his weight in food and asks for 3rds and 4ths and now barely eats one serving and Ethan doesn't want to eat whatsoever. We're lucky if we get 4 bites in him. Then again if she actually knew what her kids ate and when she'd know just how sick they are...but...

Oh ya know, it's no big deal to let your children run around like this infecting everyone and for the 5th time we'll take them to the doctor and we'll be told they need antibiotics...for that minor cough and sniffle. &^%#$*&@#$&*%$#F (that's me cursing under my breath) I'll end there before I get myself so worked up I can't see straight and then tonight i'll be dreaming of cliffs and shotguns.

I have literally lysol'ed everything! Door knobs, countertops, bathroom sinks, bunk bed rails, light switches, toys etc etc etc etc etc and yet I still get it.

Where does one buy bubbles because I'm putting myself in one and Emery as soon as he gets here. I don't want to vaccinate him until he's older but with all the shit they catch from her nasty house it's gonna do more harm than good.

Of course I won't even waste my time going to the doctor because they'll tell me its viral and I have to wait it out. I won't even have the strength to push this baby out because I guarantee I'll still be sick 6 weeks from now.

JOY!