Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Overwhelmed.

The more I think about parenting the more I get a little nervous. I know it'll just come to me, I've always had great instinct but its the little things. I grew up around all girls. I have two sisters, my 3 closest cousins are like sisters, I've been around my aunts all my life growing up. I had my dad but of course he had 3 girls so what happens if I have a boy?! Thank Gosh Jake has 2 of them. Do you call it a wee-wee or a pee-pee or are you supposed to be politically correct and call it a penis? Shoot I grew up and we called our girly parts our TuTu. Don't ask me how it came about, that's just what it was end of story. If I have a girl is that what we'll call it or what do other people call it? It's little things like this that keep me awake at night.

On top of all that I stress about where we'll be living. I doubt we'll be in this house. We haven't found an apartment we like, Jake is so picky and yet our income is going to be restricted with my leave and already I've had a drop in my hours due to "new hires". I'm overwhelmed not being able to picture where the baby's crib will be set up, or how the boys room will be etc. I'm a planner. I like things planned just so, I like to know exactly what will happen and what to expect. I have a spontaneous side but that comes down to trips and adventures. When I'm dealing with a brand new life I want to feel secure about my surroundings. I'm trying really hard to not let this stress me out. I believe we have some time to figure it out but its still enough to make me want to pull hair.

I just ordered a DVD for prenatal Pilate's.



Hopefully this will get my exercise in, help me with breathing for pain management and let me relax and not worry about things so much. I found it from a blog I follow Ramblings of a Babymama So hopefully this will be a good one. If anyone has any other recommendations please let me know. I'm always open to new materials :)

With that I'm off to a girlfriends jewelery party. It'll be nice to be around some women, even though I'll only know 2 or 3. But they know how much I love my rings so maybe I'll find something reasonably priced that I love. I've become such a cheapskate and anything I buy I feel guilty about because It could have been saved for the baby. I'll start working on that after this month is over.

2 comments:

  1. If you only knew the crazy things that go through my mind at anytime of the day! And not only about the baby, but about myself and what my body is going through. I ask myself the stupidest questions (and I am a nurse for crying out loud!!!, just not a delivery nurse, therefore, I know very little about pregnancy). I think it is normal for women to feel like we are slowly going crazy during pregnancy. It must have to do with the fear of the unknown.

    If you ever need to chat about silly things, don't be shy to fire an email! I'll be happy to try and help out a fellow 1st-timer!

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  2. Thank you so much! Jake is great at being a support system and being understanding about things, but its nice to have a woman's perspective and know what they're talking about and experiencing.

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